Something Borrowed, Something Boo Page 9

  “That’s not going to happen,” I replied slowly. “I’m helping put together my brother’s wedding, and there’s still quite a bit to do.”

  “Then do it, Blake. But, and this is the most important part, do not be seen with that boy again,” AO hissed.

  “That’s impossible, too,” I started.

  “THE FUCK IT IS!” he roared so loudly I had to pull the phone away from my ear.

  “He’s the other best man, AO. He’s also the only other one helping out with the wedding. I don’t see how I can do that,” my vision was a little foggy. The enormity of what had happened was finally starting to come through, and I knew that my life as I knew it had finally come to an end. I had promised Danny that we would find a way for us to work. I saw all of that starting to crumble.

  “Then kiss your leading man status goodbye, Blake. This could be it, kiddo, do you understand that? Housewives in Kansas don’t want to fall in love with a gay actor. They don’t want to lust after a gay actor. They want to fuck you because they think it could be a possibility. We’ve been over this before.” he sighed. I knew this kind of conversation bothered him since he was about as gay as Liberace, but it was his job. He understood the rules of celebrity and Hollywood better than anyone.

  “What do I do, AO? I’m not gay, I’m Bi, and I’m tired of not being able to live my life with whomever I choose. I don’t want to lose him, AO. I think I’m really in love,” I whispered. Multitudes of thoughts scattered themselves through my mind, and I found it hard to think rationally.

  “Listen, kid. You know I love you more than just about anyone. We have been through it together since you first walked into my office at the age of nineteen. I helped make you an actor, but you… You made you a star. It’s just a job, Blake. I want to stay on this path with you, kid, I do… And listen, I’m not letting you go if you come out, I promise. I will still fight for you and who knows… Maybe you will work just as much. Maybe more… maybe less… There’s no way to know. But, in the end, just as I’ve always told you, the choice is yours.” He sounded tired and sad. He was afraid for me and what it might mean for my career if I came out. I was too.

  But I had promised Danny… I didn’t want to let him down, but he too would probably be wounded by these photos. How far would I go to justify myself? My stomach told me I was making the wrong choice by seizing up on me. I had to fight the bile back down…

  “Is there any way to stop these photos, AO?”

  We talked for another five minutes. I knew that today was not going to be a good day, no matter what I did. But for now, I needed to follow his advice. This would all be over today.

  I called Danny.

  “Hey, Lifeguard,” I said quietly into the phone. “I have some bad news.”

  He listened and said nothing. The silence on the other end of the phone was deafening.

  “So all day?” he finally asked. “Seriously, Hollywood?”

  He was starting to get pissed. I didn’t tell him everything, not yet. I was afraid that would mean the end of us and I couldn’t face that right now.

  “I know,” I moaned, mentally exhausted from the last thirty minutes. “I really am sorry, but my agent said all of it has to happen right now, Danny. If I can get away earlier, I will call you, but in all honesty, it doesn’t look good. I will finish designing the maze though. I promise.”

  “Whatever,” he exhaled loudly. “It is what it is, I guess. I mean, it’s your job. I just could really use the help.”

  “Don’t be mad, Danny… OK?”

  “I’m not mad, Blake. I’m just disappointed and confused, I guess. Don’t worry about it. I’m sure that I can get someone to help.”

  “I’ll be thinking about you all day,” I said quickly.

  “Yeah… Okay, I’ll talk to you later, I guess. Bye.” He hung up before I could even reply. I know he was stressed out. He feared that he wouldn’t be able to give the grooms the wedding they desired. He had been working his ass off all week, and now I was leaving him out there alone.

  I was an ass. I just had to see this thing through to the end. What was it going to be? My life or my career?

  I called AO back.

  “Blake,” he sounded exhausted too. “It’s all set.”

  “Good AO. Thank you.”

  13

  Danny

  “So how has this week been? I take it you are feeling stressed out by all of the planning?” Dr. Miranda asked softly. “Have you been using our tools to stay on track?”

  “Yes… The wedding planning was going great until today, actually. I guess it’s still going okay. I mean, I’m freaking out about it, and all, but we’ve been able to accomplish almost everything. Planning a wedding is a lot of work, and I’m a little mad at Everett for dumping it on my lap.” I crossed my arms, and she looked at me, knowingly. I uncrossed my arms, allowing myself to be vulnerable. Something we’d been working on from the beginning.

  “When you say we, I assume you are talking about Blake?”

  “Yes. He’s actually been a big help, until today, anyway. He had to call and cancel, some kind of Hollywood shit came up.”

  “Does that make you angry at him? How have you two been getting along? I know that you were stressed about working with him.” She took off her glasses and cleaned them with her blouse.

  “He’s been fine, and we’re getting along great. Maybe too great,” I dropped my head and stared at my shoes. Thinking about Blake lead me down a path I was afraid to explore.

  “Okay? Let’s expand on that. How does he make you feel?”

  “Dr. Miranda, I don’t think we have time for that today unless you want to cancel the rest of your clients,” I snorted. “I mean, we… have been getting along… great, if you know what I mean. He has told me that he thinks he is falling in love with me and it’s making me want to crawl under the covers and hide. Sometimes I want to hide with him and other times I just want to hide from him. I’m losing my mind, and I’m probably driving him crazy too.”

  “What are you scared of, Danny?”

  I rolled my eyes at her. “Seriously? You’ve been counseling me for over a year.”

  “So is this the same fears you had with Everett?”

  “No,” I paused, letting her question work its way through my mind. “Okay, so it’s different. It’s not a fear of commitment, or of losing myself in someone else, or not even being good enough for them. It’s… I don’t want to feel the way I felt before, you know? I don’t want to get hurt and feel lost again. Blake Hudson is… Okay, so, it’s like this. Blake is a Greek god, and I am just a human.”

  “So this is about your looks? I find that hard to believe.”

  “Sorry, no…” I was getting frustrated, I leaned forward and rested my chin on my hands. “No, I mean, I know I’m attractive. I’ve always known that. It’s just a matter of who we are, Doc. He is a Hollywood star, and I am a ski instructor slash lifeguard. He lives in LA, and I live here. He has tons of money, and I barely make it month by month. He has people who do everything for him, and I do everything myself. But… OK, that’s not even it. Let’s say that I could get past all of that. That we could get past it… He is in the closet, and I am not. I don’t want to be someone’s secret. I want to be proud of who I love, and I want him to be proud too. I don’t think he can give me that.”

  “Have you two talked about that, yet?”

  “Kind of. I mean, I told him that I couldn’t be his dirty little secret and he said I wouldn’t have to be. That we would work it out, take it day by day. I have been trying Doc, really trying to accept what the universe gives me, just like you tell me to. I’m trying to be open to the possibilities of a possibility and to not cut it off and be scared of what it could turn into, but this is terrifying. This is the big leagues, and I didn’t even know I was in the game.”

  “So Blake is gay and in the closet,” she mused. “Figures.”

  “He’s actually bi. That is something that I never even thought about
before. What would dating someone who’s bi be like? I mean, he dates boys and girls… What if he decides he would rather be with a girl? How in the hell could I handle that?”

  “What if he decides he wants to be with another boy? Danny, you can’t always worry about the ‘what if’s.’ What if I die tomorrow? What if I… what if… It means nothing. It’s the psyche forcing doubts as a way to protect yourself from the unknown. What if’s are stupid, Danny. You are not. If he chooses you- he wants you. There’s no way to know what the future holds; which is why we must live in the now. I know you struggle with that. But you have to stop listening to those nagging doubts. You deserve a chance at happiness, Danny. You deserve it all.”

  “So you think what? I should give him a chance to disappoint or hurt me?”

  “No. You should give Blake a chance to not hurt you. You should give yourself a chance to not disappoint Blake. Do you understand?”

  I sighed and leaned back in her chair. My palms were sweaty, and I wiped them off onto my jeans. “I understand. I’m just scared to death.”

  14

  Blake

  Today has been one of the hardest and longest days of my life. To give something up that you love is unfeasible, but sometimes the right choice isn’t the easy one. My agent, AO, helped me to see that. I have no idea what to do now. Now I just wait and see if it's enough.

  I have no concept about how I will tell Danny or how he will take it, but I owe it to him, to be honest. I still feel the softness of his lips and the hardness of his body if I shut my eyes and I don’t want to lose that. But I might.

  I have done a lot of things for my career and made multitudes of sacrifices along the way, never knowing how many of them would be successes or failures. Today has been a roll of the dice. The pictures have not been released, thankfully. AO saw to that as did my PR firm. I don’t know how they did it, or how much they paid, but the photos are now with them where they will never see the light of day.

  I texted Danny a couple times throughout the day.

  Blake- How’s it going? Sorry bout this.

  Danny-U suck!

  Blake- U have no idea.

  Danny-Tease. I’m lifting shrubbery right now. Can’t talk.

  Blake-Can I come over ltr tonite?

  Danny- Can u?

  Blake- Smartass. 8 ok?

  Danny-Sure. I might b done by then.

  Blake-K

  Danny-u ok?

  Blake- Talk ltr.

  I saw the dots appear and disappear in our text thread. Danny was trying to ask what was the matter, I’m sure. I couldn’t have told him then. Not sure how I’m going to tell him now, and I’m really not sure what his answer will be. I don’t think he’ll hate me. Hopefully, he will see it was inevitable. It was the way it had to end.

  My hands were shaking as I drove into his driveway. I had paced my bedroom floor all day and worn out the floorboards. Mrs. Markle kept bringing food up to me to make sure that I ate. She was concerned about me, I knew. It was easy to fall in love with Point Pleasant. The people here actually cared about each other.

  I sat in the car for a few minutes and tried to think about what I was going to say to him. How would I break the news? I had spent the last few hours going over and over this speech in my room. But, now that I was here… I didn’t know what to say. Life without Danny… well, it wasn’t something I even wanted to think about. It had only been a few days, but I knew without a doubt, I loved him. Sadly I knew that sometimes love was not enough. I learned that the hard way, more than once.

  I turned the car off and slowly walked up to Danny’s door and rang the bell. The chime was clear and short, unpretentious just like the person who lived here.

  Danny opened the door and nodded at me. The earth beneath me shifted. My head spun with the sight of him standing there in a pair of jean shorts and nothing else. His wet muscular torso on full display and the small sprinkling of hair that peppered his chest glistened with droplets of water. His hair, disheveled from drying it with a towel was still damp, and his curls hung loose and covered one of his bright blue eyes.

  I stood there, dumbfounded at the sight of him. His beauty was remarkable- it always had been. My brain tried to formulate a sentence, to say ‘hi’ but it was lost to me. Danny reached out and took my hand and guided me inside, never saying a word. He shut the door behind him, and the world became a cacophony of feeling and desire.

  Danny pushed me against the wall and pressed his body against mine. He held my arms above my head confidently, as he pressed them into the wall keeping me in place. “I don’t want to fight anymore,” he whispered, his nose pressed against mine. His lips, soft yet firm in their need sucked on my bottom lip, and he slowly slid his tongue between my lips. He was on fire, hot and wet and passionate as he took what he wanted from me. Our tongues intertwined and he grinded lightly into me our manhood’s growing at the contact and friction he provided.

  Holy shit. Danny was as much an alpha as me, and I should have known he was probably a top. He was in charge and sure of himself. Every thought I had before I walked into this house was gone. There was only Danny.

  His lips never left mine as he lowered my arms and placed them against his hard chest. I fingered his nipples and gently pinched one of them as he started unbuttoning my shirt. His hands were quick, and he pushed my shirt off from my shoulders and onto the floor. His hands found my broad shoulders and kneaded them before they brushed over my biceps and explored my chest and abs. His fingers left trails of fire wherever they touched. My cock throbbed and pulsated against the waistband of my jeans, threatening to break through the fabric with my desire for him.

  My hands felt his hot skin as our mouths kept exploring each other. We shared breath as our tongues fought for dominance inside our mouths. I reached down and groped his ass through his jean shorts, and he grinded against me harder, moans escaping his lips as I rolled his cheeks through the fabric with my palms. Fuck… Danny was packing. I should have known.

  He pulled back and slowly unbuttoned his shorts. They fell to the ground, and he kicked them out of the way. I ripped my pants open and let them fall down by my feet, struggling to get them out of the way and finally kicking them so hard they landed with a thud in the corner by the door.

  “Damn… Blake,” he licked his lips as he admired my rather well-endowed cock, his eyes glazing over at the sight of it.

  I reached down and wrapped my hand around his hard shaft. It was impressive; seven inches and thick. He mewled as I caressed him and he pushed himself back into me, his cock already leaking and slicking my fingers. He touched my girthy cock and stroked it in rhythm with me.

  “Awww fuck Danny, that feels so good.”

  He reached down and took my nipple in his teeth, gently biting on it and rolling it around in his mouth. My knees almost gave out. Pleasure rippled through me as Danny had his way with me. I knew it wasn’t enough. It could never be enough as he peppered my chest with kisses and licks. I needed him so bad it was making my body ache.

  I reached over and put my arms around his waist and picked him up. He wrapped his legs around me and licked my chin before kissing me fervently, moans escaping both of our lips. I carried him, as best I could into his living room and we fell onto his couch, his body lying on top of mine. His thumb found my slit, and he played with it, rolling his thumb around my crown- I almost came undone as he swished it around playing with the leaky head before palming my shaft and rubbing it roughly.

  I took him in my arms and flipped us over. It took a second. I was more muscular than Danny, but he wasn’t small. His tight and firm body didn’t want to lose its purchase against my skin, but eventually, I got him where I wanted him and straddled him, holding his arms above his head as I kissed his chest slowly, savoring the taste of his skin.

  I nuzzled into his armpit and licked the soft hair there, swirling it around with my tongue. He pressed himself into me, and I slowly let my tongue explore his torso, drawing it from his pit to
his nipple which I sucked on and bit. His gasps and spasms of pleasure threatened to knock me off the couch while I chewed on his hard nub and sucked it into my mouth over and over.

  “Blake… Please?” he begged as he pushed himself hard into me. I knew what he wanted- what he needed- and I let go of his arms and explored his body with my tongue, finding my way down into his soft pubic hair. I inhaled his scent, his pheromones driving me wild. I grasped his shaft at the base and cupped his balls with my other hand, pulling them down gently, and eliciting pants of pleasure as my mouth found his head and my tongue swiped and rolled itself across his crown.

  His hands found purchase on top of my head, and he slowly pushed himself into my mouth, gasping at its warmth and wetness. I took his shaft all the way to the base and slowly back up its length. I glanced up and watched his face as I took him, his hooded eyes staring back at me lustfully.

  “Oh shit… That’s so good, Hollywood. Fuck you feel so good,” he moaned as I swallowed him again, this time allowing him as far as he could get within my throat and I too moaned as he pistoned himself slowly in my gullet. He fucked my lips and grinded his pubes against my nose with every thrust. I could feel my cock throbbing as he had his way with my mouth, the pace of his fucking growing more intense as he slid himself in and out from between my greedy lips.

  He pulled me off of his cock after shoving it in one last time. “I want to taste you too,” he begged. I stood up and straddled his head before I propped myself up on my elbows and took him in my mouth again. I felt his tongue lick my shaft. “Awwww… Danny…”

  Fuck, he was good at this. He lapped my shaft and sucked on my balls, before taking them in his mouth and rolling them around with his tongue. “Shit… oh yes, fuck that feels so good,” I growled before impaling myself on his thick meaty cock. We stayed in our sixty-nine for what felt like an eternity, sucking and licking until we were both dripping with sweat, it intermingled as our bodies rubbed against each other. I couldn’t get enough of Danny, and from the way he was using my tool as a lollipop, he couldn’t get enough of me either.